The Chestnut Didn't Crack

Perhaps the sporting event that's your cup of tea this holiday weekend involves green grass and white shorts. 

But I liked celebrating July 4th with a more down to earth, unequivocally AMERICAN event.
 

The skilled commentators covering this elite contest said Joey Chestnut displayed the mark of a true champion in winning his 7th consecutive Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest by downing 69 hot dogs (and more importantly in keeping them DOWN) in 10 minutes! The announcers' admiration knew no bounds as they pointed out that Joey “Jaws” Chestnut always wants to improve his performance. Isn't that the mark of every great professional athlete?

 

Oh, sorry, don't look at that picture. Look at this one where I blurred out the rather unpleasant aftermath of the contestants' vigorous chewing.

 Here, this one is far enough away that you won't lose your lunch:

 Look how festive the scene looks:

Here is the final scoreboard of the results:



They displayed the number of dogs eaten as they were being consumed. NO ONE had ever eaten this many at an official event* before. Joey broke the old record (his!) and the new world record is now 69!

Joey is triumphant. He said he was going home "to rest".

Along with parades, patriotism and fireworks, the annual Nathan's Hot Dog Contest is the perfect example of the indomitable American human spirit that triumphs on Independence Day.

                           

 *The great eating champion, Takeru Kobayashi, six-time winner of the Nathan's Annual Hot Dog Eating Contest, was again excluded from this event, because he has refused to sign the exclusive contract that Major League Eating requires of its competitors. MLE is the organization that sponsors the great eating events of the world, including the Nathan’s Hot Dog Contest, the Korea Town World Kimchi Eating Championship and the Hooters World Wing-Eating Championship.

One of the stipulations that Kobayashi objects to is that MLE gets a cut of ANY endorsement deal the “athlete” signs. Kobayashi has found a home with The Hofmann Sausage Co. and competes in separate events, which unfortunately do not have the same world class status as the MLE ones. He has eaten 69 hot dogs in an unsanctioned event, which Joey Chestnut likens to practice at home and says he's done the same thing.