CHEERS!

  

A little snack for Royal Wedding watching - Champagne and a petit four made from discs of Chocolate Souffle Roulade, sandwiched with cream and cherry preserves.

Top Chef Masters - Naomi Might Be A Pain, But Her Soup Garnish Is A Complete Revelation

I’ve garnished soup every which way with the usual things - croutons; chopped vegetables, frico, cream and sour cream, full-blown cheesy croutes loaded with gruyere (the best way to garnish onion soup); seafood, puff pastry crowns (LOVE THOSE!) and probably lots of other things that are escaping me for the moment.

But I have never garnished any soup with the interesting combination of items that Naomi used for her Celery Velouté. They turned out to be an ingenious, lively and quite masterly addition to a very basic soup that I don’t even like that much.

Naomi won last week’s episode of Top Chef Masters with her Celery Velouté, which, at the time, was a bit of a surprise. As I said, I don’t even like cooked celery, except in turkey stuffing, but I needed a pretty Easter soup, so I decided to try it.

The recipe is rather loosey-goosey, which annoyed me at first. Then I realized that I NEVER follow any recipe exactly, so why should I care?  Aren’t most cooks like that? When you’ve been cooking for a long time and you know your way around certain techniques, you tend to follow your instincts when you think aspects of a recipe can be improved upon. 


The funny thing is that, as lackadaisical as I am about FOLLOWING other people’s recipes, I’m completely the opposite about WRITING them. Feel free to follow this recipe exactly as written, but, of course, feel free to play with it too.

Back to the garnishes. Believe me when I tell you that I have NEVER had such delicious additions to any soup, anytime, anywhere. These were the three garnishes:
1. Shallots steeped in white wine vinegar and a little salt. 



2. Chopped Parsley steeped in olive oil.

3. The best and most fragrant and flavorful Lemon Olive Oil.
AND listen to this, I only realized, JUST NOW, as I was looking over Naomi’s recipe that I was supposed to COMBINE the chopped herb/oil mixture with the shallot and vinegar, but I didn’t. I used them separately and I will again. And again.

WHY were these garnishes so exceptional? The shallots gave an unexpected crunch to the soup. And the vinegar with it gave the soup some sharpness and brightness. The parsley added a brilliant complementary color.

And the lemon oil.  Ahhh, the lemon oil! It took the pedestrian taste of a soup  I don’t usually care for and elevated it to a richly complex set of flavors that was absolutely irresistible.

  

Plus I was lucky. I happened to have a twenty-plus dollar bottle of lemon olive oil  (unopened) in my pantry. I know it’s really pricey (it was a gift), but I’ll give you an alternative in the recipe. It’s not the put-your-head-in-tailspin-rush-of-flavor, but it will do in a pinch. Enjoy this recipe. I can’t believe how much I did.

Celery Velouté (4 generous servings)

Adapted from Naomi Pomeroy’s Celery Velouté With Salsa Verde & Lemon Oil

2 tbls. butter

6 stalks celery, chopped

2 leeks, most of green tops cut off, halved and chopped

2 onions, chopped

Kosher salt

4 cups vegetable stock

½ cup cream

Garnish:

4 tbls. chopped parsley

2 tbls. olive oil

2 tbls. shallots, finely minced

2 tbls. white wine vinegar

¼ tsp. kosher salt

A few swigs of lemon olive oil

Melt butter in large Dutch oven or heavy bottomed pot. Add celery, leeks and onions. Stir well. Add a big pinch of salt, which will draw out the liquid and help to soften the vegetables. 

 


Start pot on medium heat. When it sizzles, cover and turn heat to low. Stirring occasionally, cook until vegetables are completely soft, at least 10 to 15 minutes. (I did 20.)

Stir in stock. Bring to boil, cover and simmer for 25 minutes.

Meanwhile, stir together parsley and olive oil. In a separate little bowl, stir together shallots, vinegar and salt.

Add cream to soup. Simmer, covered, for another 5 minutes.

Let cool slightly. Purée in batches until completely smooth. Pour into individual soup bowls. Add a teaspoon of shallots to the center of the bowl. Spoon a teaspoon of the parsley mixture next to the shallots. Pour in a dab of lemon olive oil next to the other garnishes.  Serve.

Notes:

·         Soup can be served hot or cold. It can easily be made a day or two in advance.

Instead of the lemon olive oil, add plenty of lemon rind to the parsley/olive oil mixture and the shallot/vinegar mixture. And grate a bit extra over the top just before serving.

  

Top Chef Masters – The Term MASTERS Really Fits And The Judges Got It Completely Wrong

I wish there had been a break Between Top Chef and Top Chef Masters. To have TCMasters IMMEDIATELY following Top Chef was a bit onerous, so I took it upon myself to casually watch the first two episodes and not analyze the heck out of them.

The first thing that occurred to me was WHY are these chefs doing this? They are an illustrious bunch and many of them certainly don’t need more awards, but I guess they want the challenge, plus a little more fame (and more fortune) never hurts.

The number one sweetie pie has to be Mary Sue Millikin, the cooking partner of former Top Chef Master competitor, Susan Feniger. Formerly half of Two Hot Tamales, Mary Sue has the calm of a Zen master and the skill set too.

In fact, all of the chefs are wildly talented, but there are some I like better than others. Traci des Jardins could be the chef to beat, but her furrowed brow and serious demeanor scares me somewhat. The fact that she’s such good buds with Mary Sue humanizes her a little for me.

Hugh, who reminds me of a young Hugh Laurie, seems like he could be a bit tool-ish, but the other chefs are so sure of themselves and so lacking in hubris for hubris’s sake, that I don’t think HIS overactive ego is going to get any traction.

In the very first Elimination Challenge, there was a lot of hugging going on, much of it to and from Mary Sue – she seems to be the heart of the kitchen.

Hugh was eliminated at the end of episode one, which didn’t bother me one bit. Then John Rivera Sedlar had to drop out and they brought Hugh back. Note: I can’t tell if this is why Sedlar left so suddenly - that it was all too much for him to handle as he was about to open a new restaurant.

The second week, they had to redo awful 60’s classics. The best part was when Floyd Cardoz had NO clue what Ambrosia was and managed to make the almost-winning dish.

Mary Sue won with deviled eggs. James said they were unctuous in the mouth. I’m guessing that’s a good thing. Is it even possible to be unctuous anywhere other than the mouth?

At the end of episode two, Chef Sue Zemanick was eliminated for not getting all her food on the plate. Afterwards, she and Suvir totally confused their competitors when they walked back into the kitchen and he said "I’m leaving" and she said "He’s leaving with me". The others said WHAT??? They were kidding, but it was dumb. Don’t be making jokes about two chefs leaving. It might be true next time!


So here we are at Episode Three. 

The chefs come into the kitchen and see Curtis standing next to a table with stuff that looks like houseplants. The chefs ask Hugh Acheson what all that stuff is. I guess he’s some kind of outdoorsy expert. He starts rattling off salsify, leather fern, but tells us that something else is hidden there.

Curtis says you can find these things in the wild - grass, leaves, flowers, roots - AND (if you saw the previews you know what’s next) HORNED WORMS. Gross. Alex says “Horned WHAT?” There’s more. Darkling Beetles. John Currence says (to us), “We’re going to have to cook with freakin’ BUGS!”

Curtis adds some more to the list - crickets, which have 3 times more iron than beef and Canadian night crawlers. All of these things are very much alive and crawling around in glass containers. I’m guessing there are no vegetarians there. OH, wait, Suvir is one, but he cooks meat and NEVER tastes it and seems to have no problem...for the moment. Oh, lastly we hear there are scorpions. Lovely. They have to make a five star dish for enthusiastic bug eaters. They have 20 minutes. Barf.   

Here are the dishes, many of which are southeast Asian inspired.      

I love Suvir saying he grew up in New Delhi in a Hindu household and they ate “what was abundantly available without somebody having to take another life. Butchering animals is something (he) just can’t do.”

He comes up with what I think is an ingenious solution, although others may say it’s a copout. He’s making a Himalayan salad (even the NAME sounds peaceful) and he’s serving it with a jar of worms and a torch. If the tasters want to immolate the worms themselves, that’s fine, but he won’t.

The judges are Ruth England and Mykel Hawke from Man, Woman, Wild. Ruth says Naomi’s nightcrawlers have a bitter aftertaste. Myke doesn’t seem to notice. Curtis will only try the salad; Mykel doesn’t bother with the salad and goes right for the bugs. Ruth loves Hugh’s carrot purée with crickets. Myke hates the look of it, but loves the taste. (I kind of think he would like a bug in any form, any where, any how.)  Interestingly, Myke wishes that Celina had removed the legs of her crickets (ew), because they’re a bit scratchy going down. 

So how do they feel about Suvir’s presentation? Initially, Ruth says it was a copout. Then Myke takes the challenge and snaps one of the worms in half and torches it and eats it. He says the whole dish has a nice flavor. Suvir is happy that they don’t reject it out of hand.

John’s grilled scorpion with a smoked egg does well. Mary Sue uses her beetles in a vinaigrette over a Thai sunchoke salad. Ruth and Myke both love it, especially with all the fresh cilantro.

Ruth thinks Traci’s scorpion salad is a bit bitter, from the aloe, though, not the scorpions. Myke really “digs” Floyd’s nightcrawler omelet (gosh, that would give you nightmares, wouldn’t it?). Alex’s angel hair with beetles goes over well. George’s hornworm soup did NOT.

Their least favorites:

George and Suvir, who says his “hands can cook” but he can’t take a life. Myke says that’s “all good”.

Favorites – Hugh and Mary Sue. The winner is Hugh who gets $5000 for Wholesome Wave  AND immunity. He says he is the phoenix of the competition.

The Elimination Challenge is to cook a ten course dinner for a fund raiser for the chefs’ charities. Each chef is responsible for one course. They have to work with what’s in the pantry and they have 3 hours to cook.

Traci says this sounds too easy. Oops, don’t say that. Is that a clue that she’ll be going home? Suddenly Curtis throws a wrench into the works, of course, he does. He says there will be a curve balls coming their way. What? One-handed cooking? No implements? Changing dishes midstream. I hate all that.

Naomi takes it upon herself to organize the menu and write everyone’s dish down, so they don’t have duplicates, which is quite smart, I think. Alex thinks she’s bossy.

George discovers rather quickly that there’s no running water in the kitchen. GROSS! Why do they always have to do things that impact kitchen hygiene?

When they (a different group) cooked from pots and pans just opened in a Target with no visible running water, it was very worrying to me. How can they cook with no water, when they didn’t know that was coming? I know that’s the point, but I don’t like it.

I like when Floyd says he’s worried, because he’s working with raw fish and he can’t wash his hands. EXACTLY! That’s horrible.

George finds this somewhat fitting, because he’s competing for a charity that brings water to people that don’t have it. (Okay, that IS a bit interesting, but not if they weren’t expecting it.)

I love Floyd worrying about contamination. He takes some ice and starts to boil water. (He’d be good if a baby were coming too.)

I also love Suvir who says he never gets stressed in a kitchen. He says for him, it’s calming and therapeutic (being in a kitchen, not being without water). Let’s see how he reacts when Curtis comes in and says that service will start 30 minutes earlier than he had said. He gets mildly fluffed, but not crazy. (I have to try that. Maybe it’s all in the breathing. Iiinnn and ooouuuttt. Iiinnn and ooouuuttt. Mmm, THAT does feel better.)

Naomi admits that she’s become the bossy person, but she doesn’t care. She just wants the meal to go off without a hitch. Curtis comes back in and says he has some bad news. OY! Now what? There will be no waiters, they have to serve the dishes themselves. Oh good, there’s nothing like a sweaty, dirty chef with unwashed hands, serving all the plates that really makes me feel good about a meal.

Guests arrive, including judges James Oseland and Danyelle Freeman.  She looked super familiar to me in the first episode. She was (is?) an actress, but I’m pretty sure I never saw any of her stuff, but I feel as if I know her from somewhere.

Celina is out in the dining room pouring wine and Curtis introduces her to one new judge, Alan Sytsma, editor of Grubstreet. CELINA SHAKES HIS HAND! Eww! Does he realize that there was no water in the kitchen?!! Alan says he worked as an intern for James when he started his food writing career. That’s kind of interesting. He says it was his first job of NOT cutting carrots.

The dishes are here. James says Mary Sue’s Ceviche is attractive, but doesn’t have a lot of flavor. Alan says it’s like “a poorly made guacamole”. They all love Suvir’s chickpea salad.

James: George’s shrimp is “a really gorgeous plate of food”. They all rave about it, except that it has perhaps a bit too much salt. Naomi’s celery velouté is beautiful and delicious. Curtis thinks it may be too rich for a ten course meal.

Alan is unsure if he likes the crunch of the pine nuts in John Currence’s risotto. Danyelle likes it. James says the same basic thing about everyone and in a rather ponderous, pompous tone – that the dish is not a stretch for the chef and they’re not going outside of his or her comfort zone.

Floyd’s sole with roasted cauliflower is fantastic, says James. Various folks think the broth underneath is a bit too strong.

Naomi and Hugh bat heads a bit, because she’s getting the plates out the door. (Maybe before they’re ready…What does she care? Her soup already went out. I could see that that could be annoying.)

What I’m REALLY FRUSTRATED about is Hugh telling us multiple times that there are some frustrations between “Naomi AND I”. NO!!! There is frustration between Naomi and ME!” Oy! WHY do people say that? It sounds sooo dumb! The word “I” NEVER comes after “BETWEEN”, unless someone’s actual NAME is “I”! Got it?!!

What I can’t understand is, that with the reputation that most chefs have, they wouldn’t be thrilled at saying ME, ME, ME, every chance they got!

I like the sound of Alex’s roasted salmon with gazpacho vegetables and tomatillo salsa. James thinks it’s too raw. Danyelle thinks it’s perfect.

James LOVES Traci’s rib eye. Curtis says just by looking at the dish you can tell the chef knows how to cook meat. Danyelle calls it “musty”. Alan calls it “swampy”. James says they’re young and brainwashed and that what Traci has given them is “BOLD, cooked vegetables.” I’d probably side with the old guy.

Hugh is serving panna cotta, but he’s not worried because he has immunity. Delicious, folks say.

I hate Celina calling her dish, Chocolate Puddin’. Why does that make me vaguely uneasy like they’re in a Cracker Barrel or something? Suvir tells us that this is not HIS idea of pudding. He thinks hers resembles the mass-marketed, plastic tasting junk sold in America. He says the texture is not good. James says it’s chalky and gritty. Danyelle says it’s sort of tasteless.

The diners are to vote on their favorite dish and give that chef a 100 dollar donation to his or her charity.

Naomi and Suvir are the first called in. That HAS to be good, right?

The judges stare at the chefs. The chefs stare at the judges. James, in particular, has the stone-faced look down to a science. I would just giggle, I think.

Their dishes received the most votes from the diners. Oh good, I like it when a chef who doesn’t murder animals gets recognized. Naomi’s dish got 43% of the votes, so $1800 goes to Seed Savers Exchange.  Alan says the acidity of the lemon oil on top brought a brightness to Naomi’s soup.

I love this show. The only thing better than watching people cook and watching people taste AND hearing what they say about the food, would be tasting it and blathering about it myself.

Suvir’s dish got 40% of the vote and his charity, Agricultural Stewardship, will receive $1700. The judges, critics, whatever, pick Naomi as the winner and her charity gets an additional $10,000. I bet Hugh will be po’ed.

They call in Mary Sue, Celina and John. I hope Mary Sue and John make it to another week. I like Celina, but I’m more interested in the other two going further. More chef/judge and judge/chef staring back and forth.

                

James says Mary Sue’s ceviche was too bland. Alan seems to criticize the fact that John’s risotto was TOO classic, too perfect. He definitely should NOT go home for that.

They move on to Celina’s pudding and how it wasn’t rich enough. I don’t like that judges, Alan and Danyelle, actually say PUDDIN’. I would have refused to. It seems clear that Celina’s dish was the worst.

And going home is…JOHN!!! WHAT???!!! GMAB! That IS ridiculous. REALLY ridiculous! I’m mad. Really mad. Celina SHOULD have gone home. I am SOOO mad. That is a really wrong decision!!! John goes home for making an excellent risotto that just wasn’t ground-breaking and Celina stays for making a BAD pudding?!!@#$%*. 

Really poor decision. I wouldn’t just be disappointed if I were John, I’d be enraged. I MAY tune in this week, after I do some deep-breathing. 

Happy Easter!!!

A darling young friend of mine, J, made these fantastic Sushi Peeps for me. She cut store-bought Rice Krispie Treats into long pieces, rolled them up and covered them with strips of Fruit Roll-Ups. She topped them with the top half of Peeps and garnished her creation with festive jelly beans. I was thrilled and very impressed. I hope you're celebrating Easter with wonderful friends and family.

I know this will be a good Easter, because the Easter Bunny visited us yesterday. He (she?) took some time out for some grooming and relaxing.

Here he's tending to his feet.

Here he's taking a break from his busy preparations.

And, HERE, The Easter Bunny is obviously considering the day to come, as he sits wriggling his nose deep in thought. 

Have a great one. Enjoy your Easter promenade AND dinner! 

Happy Earth Day, Earthlings…and others too.

I don’t have any little kids at home, so I can’t expect any portraits made from egg shells or herb plants grown in milk cartons today. Even though I do subscribe to the theory that every day should be Earth Day, I guess we should honor the earth just a little more today. It's the same way that your family should honor Mom all year long, but if they throw a parade for you on Mother's Day, of course, you'll take it. (As if.)

I’m not the greatest greenest person, but what I do, I do regularly. I focus many of my efforts in the kitchen, since that’s where I spend the most time. I  try to cut down on the enormous waste of food that we are all probably guilty of. One thing in particular that annoys me is when I let lemons and limes go bad. They’re not cheap and I always need them, so then I always have to buy more.

I actually made a New Year’s resolution a few years ago to ALWAYS squeeze any leftover lemons and limes and freeze the juice. I have to say that I do it more than I don’t, but there is still the occasional wrinkled citrus fruit in the drawer.

I have always been rigorous about measuring out leftover tomato paste in tablespoonfuls, freezing it until hard and then bagging it up for the freezer. That was before I discovered squeezable tomato paste. Then I read this and this, just after I had bought tons of gorgeous Italian canned tomatoes on sale. Oy, I don’t love the Pomi stuff, but maybe I need to.

The most green thing I do in the kitchen is against everything I ever learned in cooking school or any professional kitchen. I do NOT clean up as I go. (We would actually be marked on that aspect of our cooking stations at the Cordon Bleu.) One reason is sheer time. I figure it takes less time to deal with ONE largish load of dishes than 8 little ones. Plus I really try not to run water indiscriminately in the sink. That’s the other reason I don’t clean up as I go - it takes more water. (I wish I could just throw stuff immediately into the dishwasher, but my water is too hard and icky stuff never gets cleaned off.)

I take the largest thing – a pot, a bowl, whatever – and run hot soapy water in it and put all the dirty stuff in there to sit until I’m ready to load the dishwasher.

When I’m ready, I use the water in the bowl or pot and scrap off the gunk and then put everything in the dishwasher. I don’t continuously run water to rinse everything to make it look clean. And my dishwasher is always more than full.

It’s funny…for YEARS, I’ve been saying to H, “I need another dishwasher,” as I’m trying to jam in everything. I only recently found out that he thought I was being spoiled, because I already have a nice dishwasher. What he didn’t understand was that I was being REALLY spoiled, because I didn’t want a DIFFERENT dishwasher, I wanted an ADDITIONAL dishwasher.

We all know by now that hand-washing uses TONS more water than dishwashers and is much less sanitary. Particularly in the winter, a dishwasher is better for getting rid of flu-ey germs. I can’t stand stuff that is hand-washed, it just doesn’t feel clean to me, although, of course, there are some things that have to handled by hand. (AND I also hate the idea of using a dishtowel to dry things.)

I try to unplug just about everything, except my KitchenAid. Don’t tell anyone. The plug is kind of hard to get in and out and my coffee maker, too, I leave plugged in. It holds the water at some temperature or other, but if Leo came to my house, I could be persuaded to unplug that.   

The other thing I do to try to cut down on waste is to put tons of stuff in the fridge and freezer. My refrigerator is definitely not ready for prime-time, because I have so much in there. But I’d rather have something languishing in a temperature-controlled environment than on a pantry shelf somewhere, with critters possibly getting into it. I’ve been really good recently about freezing over-ripening bananas. Here’s my reward for that:

The Best Ever Banana Shake (It makes a VERY generous shake for one or plenty for two.)

  

  

Peel a banana and put it in the freezer, wrapped in wax paper. When it’s frozen, place it in the bottom of a blender with ½ cup crushed ice and then add 1 cup organic, non-fat yogurt. (The ice is essential.) Blend until smooth…for as long as you can stand the noise. 

You may add ½ cup fresh blueberries or strawberries when you add the yogurt, but you absolutely don’t need to.

Pour into a glass and revel in your Banana Shake. Drink to Mother Earth!

Breaking News - Well, Maybe That’s A Bit Of A Stretch – Let’s Try…Interesting News – Ina’s Dislike Of A Certain Fresh Herb

Barefoot Contessa with Ina Garten

Italian Old and New

Tomatoes Roasted with Pesto

Antonia's Pasta Alle Melenzana (Eggplant Pasta)

Roasted Red Peppers

Three Italian Desserts

Now this interesting - Ina is roasting regular-sized round tomatoes. I’ve roasted plum tomatoes and cherry and grape tomatoes, but never regular round ones. She gathers them from her (huge) walled garden with lots of basil. She slices them thickly. I wouldn’t have thought to cut them that way. Then she lays them out on a non-parchmented baking sheet so they get browned. She sprinkles (well, this is the Contessa, more like slathers) them with olive oil and salt.

Here’s the interesting thing that I’m not sure I knew about Ina. She doesn’t like fresh oregano. She finds it too strong, so she adds some DRIED oregano to the tomatoes. She rubs it between her palms to get the oil going. (I NEVER DON’T do that. In other words, I ALWAYS rub dried herbs between my palms when I add them to anything.) Then “lots of salt and pepper” go on. She puts the tomatoes in a 425°F oven for ten minutes, then she tops them with pesto and Parmesan. How easy is that?

For the pesto, Ina puts a ¼ cup of walnuts and a ¼ cup of pine nuts in a food processor with 3 tablespoons garlic (9 cloves). She whirls that around and adds 5 cups of basil leaves.

By the way, to store washed basil, so it doesn’t go brown, Ina says to spin it until it’s really dry in a lettuce spinner. Then place it in a plastic bag with a slightly damp paper towel and it will stay nice and green.

Ina adds a teaspoon each of salt and pepper to the processor and purées it. She adds ONE and A HALF CUPS of olive oil slowly with the machine running. (Isn’t that A LOT of oil?) She adds one cup of Parmesan cheese, which has been ground (not grated) in the processor.

Ina takes out the tomatoes and puts a spoonful of pesto on each tomato with some Parmesan. They go back into the 425°F oven for 7 to 10 minutes.

To store the remainder of the 4 cups of pesto that she’s made, Ina says to put it in smaller container and cover the top with olive oil, so no air gets into the pesto itself and then she freezes it.

If I’m using up basil and making the pesto for the freezer, I will often leave out the cheese and sometimes the garlic.

The tomatoes come out. Yum! Ina salts them some more. (They can’t possibly need that!) She says they make a great side dish. I agree.

During the commercial, Bobby gives us a good grilling tip, which is to leave vegetables in big pieces when you grill them and THEN cut them up. He grills zucchini, cut in half lengthwise. I just saw that somewhere for peppers and it really makes sense. How much easier is it to grill a half a pepper beautifully than all these little mingy pieces? Good tip.

Ina’s back in the kitchen with friend Antonia Bellanca to cook pasta with eggplant. They chop up one big onion and one eggplant and cook that in ½ cup olive oil and a bit of butter. That gets cooked for about 15 minutes.

Antonia blanches 12 plum tomatoes by putting them in boiling water “for a few minutes”.  The recipe says four to five minutes. She removes the tomatoes with a flat skimming strainer, so they can use the same water for the pasta. “Oh, that’s a good idea,” says Ina. Sono d'accordo.

Antonia adds some whole garlic cloves and branches of basil to the eggplant. Then she cores and peels the tomatoes, while Ina cuts up two kinds of mozzarella. The fresh mozzarella is more decorative and is good for laying on top and the packaged brick coats the pasta well.

Ina adds 1½ lbs. of dried fettuccine to the pasta water. Antonia squishes the tomatoes to get smaller pieces. She does that even with canned tomatoes, she says. The liquid from the tomatoes goes into the eggplant as it’s cooking with salt, pepper and a pinch of sugar. Then the tomato pieces, which look like purée, go in. 

Antonia reserves a little of the eggplant sauce for the top, while Ina drains the pasta and tosses it with the eggplant mixture and cubes of packaged mozzarella. Some sauce goes on top and then the other mozzarella. Ina and Antonia taste right from the platter. That’s okay as long as they don’t double dip.

Ina pulls up to Domaine Franey Wines And Liquors and inside she greets John. She picks up Frangelico and tells us how to make an affogato. Ina brews up an espresso (in her fancy new machine, which we can’t see). She adds a scoop of vanilla ice cream to a tall glass and pours over some of the coffee. Affogato means drowned in Italian, Ina tell us. She then pours over Frangelico, adds a shaving of dark chocolate and chopped hazelnuts. I think the hazelnuts might be kind of annoying. She adds a biscotti, which is NEVER annoying.

(This putting together of the recipe is done almost like she’s reminiscing about an old love, while she's still standing in the liquor store. It’s as if she’s in an old Italian movie.)

Ina picks up a bottle of Amaretto next. The next scene within a scene is Ina cutting a thin slice of pound cake, which she says she always has in her freezer, but store-bought is fine. (It is?) She drizzles over the Amaretto and puts a scoop of Swiss almond ice cream on top with some toasted, sliced almonds.

Cue the Italian music. (Not really, but it wouldn’t hurt.) Ina reaches for a bottle of Vin Santo, a dessert wine from Tuscany. It’s what she actually came in for before she got lost in her Amaretto/Frangelico reveries. John says to serve it slightly chilled. She asks if he can charge it to her. Absolutely, he replies. How much do you want to bet that she’ll never see the invoice for that?

Back at the farm, sorry, barn, Ina puts packaged biscotti on a plate and adds some clementines. She’s making a family style dessert, she says. Then Ina puts packaged salted caramels on the platter. Still in their papers??? Fine, if you don’t feel like making dessert, but do you have to shout store-bought?!! I don’t like that. She opens the bottle of Vin Santo and pours it into a glass set in the middle of the platter. Does everyone have to share that one little glass?

Was this entire episode phoning it in? Maybe just a little, but I did like the idea of roasting regular tomatoes and adding the pesto.

Next Ina says it’s like Jeopardy and she going to answer some questions. Andrew says his girlfriend is lactose intolerant and a vegetarian and what Italian recipes could he make her. Ina says, “Dump her!” Well, she doesn’t actually SAY it, but you know she’s thinking that. She suggests an antipasto platter, roasted eggplant tapenade and a tomato marinara sauce. She says he can add some meatballs and leave hers plain.

Tracey has a problem making a meat lasagna. She says it’s watery. Ina says the meat sauce should be really thick and she should use a thick ricotta. But she thinks the real problem is the pasta. Ina says it needs to be drained really well.  OR Tracey can soak them in the hottest tap water for a few minutes and then just layer the pasta sheets in. They won’t give off water that way and they'll absorb the liquid from the lasagna.

H, who NEVER watches the Food Network and who knows NOTHING about cooking, heard this last tip. He said, “That’s a great idea.” I said, “Since when have I ever made a watery lasagna?” He had left the room by then. AND, I added to myself, most people use those no-bake noodles anyway, so this is a moot point.

The next question is from Mark in New Jersey, who loves Italian food. His Italian bread is flat. What should he do? OMG, ADD SALT! Wadya think?

And Ina says the answer is…SALT.  Thank you. She also says not to add your salt at the same time as the yeast. He MUST know that, right? Sugar feeds yeast, salt kills it. If he’s actually making Italian bread, he should know that.

Actually, if you ever forget the salt in your bread dough, you may notice that it rises much faster, because the salt does slow down the rising action.

This is how Ina tells him to proceed. Mix together yeast, water and sugar and get that going (i.e. as in proofing the yeast). Add half the flour and then the salt. THEN add the rest of the flour. Stir in slowly.

Here’s her last question. What is the best way to preserve Italian peppers in olive oil all winter? Ina says to roast them at 500°F for 30 to 40 minutes, turning them occasionally. Remove from the oven when the skins are charred. Cover tightly with foil and cool. Cut in quarters and remove stems and seeds. Place in bowl. Pour over olive oil just to cover and refrigerate. She says they should last for two weeks, which isn’t exactly all winter, but close enough, I guess.